9/25/09

My sources at the White House tell me that The First Lady has defected to the Spin-Offs arch-nemesis: Team Hodge Podge!
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Setting: The President and First Lady are eating breakfast. Michelle Obama is reading a National Security Briefing marked "Top Priority!!!"

President Obama: (speaking to The First Lady) "I called Andy Muir on Wednesday morning to see if his hip was feeling better, and to wish the Spin-Offs good luck..."

The First Lady: (Not looking up from the Briefing, and feigning innocence) "The Spin-Offs? Oh... You mean that softball team that you're so wild about? How IS Arnie?"

President Obama: "Andy."

The First Lady: "What?"

President Obama: "The Spin-Offs' short-stop's name is Andy. And he's feeling better."

The First Lady: (Still looking down at the Briefing) "That's nice Dear."

President Obama: "Andy told me he'd heard some disturbing news Michelle."

The First Lady: (Still distracted by the Briefing) "Oh? Did he hear about Bo [The White House dog] humping The Queen's leg during her visit?"

President Obama: "No Michelle. Andy told me that you've gone and joined Team Hodge Podge ["THP"]. Is that true?"

The First Lady: "Of course not Dear. You know I would never do anything to hurt your beloved Spin-Offs..."

President Obama: "AH-HA! So you know who THP is! Admit it - you're on the team!"

The First Lady: (Standing up, taking Briefing with her) "Well I can see that I'm not going to get any reading done at the breakfast table this morning."

President Obama: (Eyes moist; stricken look on face; single tear rolling down his cheek) "Michelle! How could you??"
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9/22/09

My White House sources tell me that The President relayed the following story to Russian Prime Minister Vladamir Putin over beers in the garden. The Prime Minister was very sympathetic. Apparently his wife only lets him play softball twice a month. He did however invite The President to join him for a game of "Red Square Softball," and even offered to make him an honorary member of his "Moscow Maulers." Could a an international game between The Maulers and The Spin-Offs be far off?
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The White House: The President tip-toes past his wife's office, softball glove in hand. Unfortunately for him, The First Lady is onto him.

MO: "Barack - Did you finish your speech for the Unitded Nations?"

BO: "Yes Dear."

MO: "Did you take the dog out for a walk?"

BO: "Yes Dear."

MO: "OK then - go have fun with your Spin-Offs. Just be sure to be home in time for supper."

The President breathes a sigh of relief. He was expecting The Missus to ask him whether he'd fixed the health care problem yet!